I Am Taking Your Advice

After I posted an article describing an ill family member and the political rift in my family, many of you reached out to me to tell me to mend some fences. I listened.

A heart-shaped blooming cactus in the Arizona desert. (Photo via Getty Images)

Last week I published a very personal article about my ongoing struggles with my mom’s side of the family and the political divide that has created a canyon of regret. I am not someone who feels comfortable living with any kind of regret. I would prefer to deal with the embarrassment of going too far rather than not doing enough. So, when I found out my estranged uncle was so ill he would probably not make it through another surgery, I felt torn.

The great news is that he has survived three more surgeries and sepsis and looks to be slowly but steadily recovering! I am taking this as a sign to spend some much needed time with my family, so I used the last of my airline miles to surprise my Mom on Mother’s Day. Don’t worry, I’m not ruining anything, I ran it all past her. The Vanderpudlians are terrible at surprises due to an overabundance of enthusiasm and an inability to keep anything quiet.

I have decided that life is too short to worry about any kind of family rift, regardless of how extreme it might feel at the time. In case you are new to SHERO, or somehow missed my posts on this issue, I encourage you to read my essays that I will post again below, that discuss this strange time we live in and the personal and political turmoil of the last eight years.

Thank you for all of your well-wishes, and for your lovely messages of support. I am taking your advice and aiming to fix whatever I can, while I can. I also firmly believe that a fresh margarita and a smidgen of a suntan can really change your perspective on life, and it is so important to refuel in these times.

Case in point — after I posted the following tweet below yesterday, many of you reached out to give me details on how to properly load up a watermelon with Vodka, per my Mom’s request. Without this guidance, I would have been trying to empty a bottle into the dang thing for hours, but now I know that a meat infuser, purchased on Amazon next day delivery, is the solution to many of my problems. Where would I be without you all?

I would like to wish everyone a very Happy Mother’s Day weekend and encourage the people who take care of us all and do the Mama-work to celebrate themselves — you make this world a better place and you are so needed. I am especially thinking about all of my Twitter Mamas, who are fiercely loyal, always the first to comment on what I say, and give me advice to let me know they worry about me — you are what makes my job a pleasure.

Our SHERO on Sunday recap will be taking the day off to celebrate, but we will be back next week with a refreshed perspective and a rested spirit. See you soon.

Love,

Amee 💋

---

Amee Vanderpool writes the SHERO Newsletter and is an attorney, published author, contributor to newspapers and magazines, and analyst for BBC radio. She can be reached at avanderpool@gmail.com or follow her on Twitter @girlsreallyrule.

Paid subscriptions and one-time tributes embedded in each article allow me to keep publishing critical and informative work that is sometimes made available to the public — thank you. If you like this piece and want to support independent journalism further, you can forward this article to others, get a paid subscription or gift subscription, or donate once, as much as you like today.